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Once you leave the womb, cons...

Once you leave the womb, conservatives don't care about you until you reach military age. Then you're just what they're looking for. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers.

George Carlin 952 quotes

The bloodiest, most brutal wa...

The bloodiest, most brutal wars fought, all based on religious hatred. Which is fine with me! Any time a bunch of holy people want to go out and kill each other I'm a happy guy!

George Carlin 952 quotes

Does killing time damage eter...

Does killing time damage eternity?

George Carlin 952 quotes

I think the warning labels on...

I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Early in my career I was divi...

Early in my career I was divided because I had the real self underneath: the lawbreaker, the anarchist, the person who swims against the tide, the outsider, the loner, all of that guy. He was my private self, and I had this other side that wanted to be liked in order to do all those things I dreamed of as a little boy. I didn't realize that those things didn't go together until later. And I'm quite sure that my use of acid and peyote helped me accept what was really going on inside of me instead of what I had imposed on myself.

George Carlin 952 quotes

An entertainer is someone who...

An entertainer is someone who pleases others, and an artist tries to please himself. An artist is on a journey: they don't know where they're going, what is going to happen, but they know they are not there yet, and there is some continuity and growth. I think of myself as an entertainer: I'm a performing entertainer, I'm a stand-up comic. But there's an artist at work here, too. One who interprets his world through his own filter.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Meow” means “woof” in cat. ...

Meow” means “woof” in cat.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Avoid teams at all cost. Keep...

Avoid teams at all cost. Keep your circle small. Never join a group that has a name.

George Carlin 952 quotes

It is said that Indians were ...

It is said that Indians were sometimes named for the first thing they saw when they were born. Makes you wonder why there aren't more Indians named Hairy Pussy, doesn't it?

George Carlin 952 quotes

If churches want to play the ...

If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else.

George Carlin 952 quotes

There may or may not be athei...

There may or may not be atheists in foxholes, but I'm certain there are none in the Ku Klux Klan.

George Carlin 952 quotes

In Hawaii they say, "aloha." ...

In Hawaii they say, "aloha." That's a nice one, It means both "hello" and "good-bye" Which just goes to show, if you spend enough time in the sun you don't know whether you're coming or going.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Can placebos cause side effec...

Can placebos cause side effects? If so, are the side effects real?

George Carlin 952 quotes

Dogs and cats get put to slee...

Dogs and cats get put to sleep; hogs and cows get slaughtered.

George Carlin 952 quotes

People can't seem to get it t...

People can't seem to get it through their heads that there is never any healing or closure. Ever. There is only a short pause before the next "horrifying" event. People forget there is such a thing as memory, and that when a wound "heals" it leaves a permanent scar that never goes away, but merely fades a little. What really ought to be said after one of these so-called tragedies is, "Let the scarring begin.

George Carlin 952 quotes

If God had intended us not to...

If God had intended us not to masturbate, He would have made our arms shorter.

George Carlin 952 quotes

One of the more pretentious p...

One of the more pretentious political self-descriptions is 'Libertarian.' People think it puts them above the fray. It sounds fashionable, and to the uninitiated, faintly dangerous. Actually, it's just one more bullshit political philosophy.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Dogs lead a nice life. You ne...

Dogs lead a nice life. You never see a dog with a wristwatch.

George Carlin 952 quotes

The truth is, Pavlov's dog tr...

The truth is, Pavlov's dog trained Pavlov to ring this bell just before the dog salivated.

George Carlin 952 quotes

I'm not an angry person, just...

I'm not an angry person, just very disappointed and contemptuous of my fellow humans' choices - and on stage those feelings sometimes are exaggerated for a theatric stage - you're on a stage you have an audience of 2500 or 3000 people: you need to project the feelings, the emotions it's heightened, and people mistake it for a personal anger but it's more dissatisfaction, disappointment and contempt for these things we've settled for.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Добрые, щедрые, великодушные: 6 советских актеров, которые были всеобщими любимчиками

23

Советских актёров часто ставят в пример как образец духовной силы, национальной гордости и внутренней красоты. Они стали символами эпохи, носителями культуры и нравственности. Но, как известно, за кул...

Десять кинозвезд, которые отлично поют

83

Актеры — люди творческие, но кто бы мог подумать, что некоторые из них скрывают прекрасный голос. В эпоху раннего Голливуда актеров с музыкальными способностями было немало — это считалось скорее норм...

Мэрилин Монро, Ким Кардашьян и другие

115

Неузнаваемая Ким Кардашьян в объективе фотографа Маркуса Клинко, 2009 год. Памела Андерсон в самой первой съёмке для журнала «Playboy», 1990. На фото голливудская актриса Dorothy Lamour и шимпанзе Джи...

Что стало с детьми-звездами: Рэдклифф и компания спустя годы

219

Расскажем, как сложилась судьба актеров, которые начинали сниматься еще в детстве.
Остаться на вершине в Голливуде удаётся не каждому, особенно если путь начался в детстве. Одни актёры теряются из-за...

Жизнь за границей: как изменились судьбы 7 уехавших телеведущих

541

Два года назад отечественное телевидение столкнулось с беспрецедентной кадровой тектоникой — целая группа ярких и узнаваемых ведущих стремительно исчезла с экранов федеральных каналов. Эти лица долгие...

Кира Найтли, Деми Мур и другие

165

Кира Найтли на страницах журнала к выходу фильма «Пиджак», 2005. Следы динозавра, раскопанные в русле реки Палакси. Техас. США. 1952г. Самая большая женщина рядом с самым маленьким мужчиной, 1922 год....