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Is a vegetarian permitted to ...

Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?

George Carlin 952 quotes

People always tell me "Have a...

People always tell me "Have a nice day." Well what if I don't want to? What if I want to have a crappy day?

George Carlin 952 quotes

The more complicated the orde...

The more complicated the order, the bigger the asshole. If you walk into a Starbucks and order a 'decaf grandee, half soy, half lowfat, iced vanilla, double-shot, gingerbread cappuccino, extra dry, light ice, with one Sweet-n'-Low and one NutraSweet,' ooooh, you're a huge asshole.

George Carlin 952 quotes

History is not happenstance: ...

History is not happenstance: it is conspiratorial. Carefully planned and executed by people in power.

George Carlin 952 quotes

The wisest man I ever knew ta...

The wisest man I ever knew taught me something I never forgot. And although I never forgot it, I never quite memorized it either. So what I’m left with is the memory of having learned something very wise that I can’t quite remember.

George Carlin 952 quotes

I have a suggestion that I th...

I have a suggestion that I think would help fight serious crime. Signs. There are lots of signs for minor infractions: No Smoking, Stay Off the Grass, Keep Out, and they seem to work fairly well. I think we should also have signs for major crimes: Murder Strictly Prohibited, NO Raping People, Thank You for Not Kidnapping Anyone. It's certainly worth a try. I'm convinced Watergate would never have happened if there had just been a sign in the Oval Office that said, Malfeasance of Office Is Strictly Against the Law, or Thank You for Not Undermining the Constitution.

George Carlin 952 quotes

The things that matter in thi...

The things that matter in this country have been reduced in choice, there are two political parties, there are a handful insurance companies, there are six or seven information centers.. but if you want a bagel there are 23 flavors. Because you have the illusion of choice!

George Carlin 952 quotes

There's a reason education su...

There's a reason education sucks, and it's the same reason it will never ever ever be fixed. It's never going to get any better. Don't look for it. Be happy with what you've got, because the owners of this country don't want that. I'm talking about the real owners now... the real owners. The big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. Forget the politicians. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. You don't. You have no choice. You have owners.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Isn’t making a smoking sectio...

Isn’t making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?

George Carlin 952 quotes

Why is the man who invests al...

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

George Carlin 952 quotes

Good news for senior citizens...

Good news for senior citizens: Death is near!

George Carlin 952 quotes

Oh Beautiful for smoggy skies...

Oh Beautiful for smoggy skies, insecticided grain, For strip-mined mountain's majesty above the asphalt plain. America, America, man sheds his waste on thee, And hides the pines with billboard signs, from sea to oily sea.

George Carlin 952 quotes

When I hear a person talking ...

When I hear a person talking about political solutions, I know I am not listening to a serious person.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Capitalism tries for a delica...

Capitalism tries for a delicate balance: It attempts to work things out so that everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from getting violent and trying to take other people’s stuff.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Political discourse has been ...

Political discourse has been reduced to "Where's the beef?" "Read my lips," and "Make my day." Where are the assassins when we really need them?

George Carlin 952 quotes

If someone with multiple pers...

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

George Carlin 952 quotes

If God didn't want you to mas...

If God didn't want you to masturbate, he would have given you short arms.

George Carlin 952 quotes

I was thinking about how peop...

I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me . . they’re cramming for their final exam.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Before they give you a lethal...

Before they give you a lethal injection, they swab your arm with alcohol. It's true. Well, they don't want you to get an infection, and you can see their point. They don't want some guy go to hell and be sick.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Age is a hell of a price to p...

Age is a hell of a price to pay for wisdom.

George Carlin 952 quotes

Добрые, щедрые, великодушные: 6 советских актеров, которые были всеобщими любимчиками

23

Советских актёров часто ставят в пример как образец духовной силы, национальной гордости и внутренней красоты. Они стали символами эпохи, носителями культуры и нравственности. Но, как известно, за кул...

Десять кинозвезд, которые отлично поют

83

Актеры — люди творческие, но кто бы мог подумать, что некоторые из них скрывают прекрасный голос. В эпоху раннего Голливуда актеров с музыкальными способностями было немало — это считалось скорее норм...

Мэрилин Монро, Ким Кардашьян и другие

115

Неузнаваемая Ким Кардашьян в объективе фотографа Маркуса Клинко, 2009 год. Памела Андерсон в самой первой съёмке для журнала «Playboy», 1990. На фото голливудская актриса Dorothy Lamour и шимпанзе Джи...

Что стало с детьми-звездами: Рэдклифф и компания спустя годы

219

Расскажем, как сложилась судьба актеров, которые начинали сниматься еще в детстве.
Остаться на вершине в Голливуде удаётся не каждому, особенно если путь начался в детстве. Одни актёры теряются из-за...

Жизнь за границей: как изменились судьбы 7 уехавших телеведущих

541

Два года назад отечественное телевидение столкнулось с беспрецедентной кадровой тектоникой — целая группа ярких и узнаваемых ведущих стремительно исчезла с экранов федеральных каналов. Эти лица долгие...

Кира Найтли, Деми Мур и другие

165

Кира Найтли на страницах журнала к выходу фильма «Пиджак», 2005. Следы динозавра, раскопанные в русле реки Палакси. Техас. США. 1952г. Самая большая женщина рядом с самым маленьким мужчиной, 1922 год....