Skip to main content

You folks like TV, you watch ...

You folks like TV, you watch a lot of TV? There's a show right here on CBS, it's a huge hit. It's called the "Mentalist." And it's about this guy who has a heightened sense of observation. It's miraculous; he's the only guy in the world who can tell the difference between Sarah Palin and Tina Fey.

David Letterman 644 quotes

Mitt Romney has asked Todd Ak...

Mitt Romney has asked Todd Akin to step down. That's too bad. Todd Akin was the guy to lead the Republican Party into the 16th century.

David Letterman 644 quotes

Mitt Romney is quite a guy. A...

Mitt Romney is quite a guy. At one point he and his wife bought a zoo and fired all the animals.

David Letterman 644 quotes

The entire island of Martha's...

The entire island of Martha's Vineyard has gone Obama crazy. There's even a cocktail that they've named after Barack Obama. It's called the Obamarita. Not to be confused with a cocktail inspired by John McCain, the Cosmopoligrip. And then there was one a couple of years ago inspired by George W. Bush, the Mojidiot. Of course, there was the Bill Clinton Screwdriver.

David Letterman 644 quotes

It's autumn in New York. The ...

It's autumn in New York. The colors are changing ? yellow, the browns, the greens, the oranges. And that's just the tap water.

David Letterman 644 quotes

Happy Birthday to Fay Wray, a...

Happy Birthday to Fay Wray, a wonderful actress. She was, of course, in the movie 'King Kong' and would have been 99-years-old today. She was famous because of her love interest with a giant ape, and, wait a minute, that's Maria Shriver.

David Letterman 644 quotes

The creepy stuff was that I h...

The creepy stuff was that I have had sex with women who worked for me on this show. Now, my response to that is yes I have. I have had sex with women who worked on this show. Would it be embarrassing if it were made public? Perhaps it would, especially for the women.

David Letterman 644 quotes

In pop culture news, Lady Gag...

In pop culture news, Lady Gaga got married. And yes, she was wearing white meat.

David Letterman 644 quotes

Here's why Sarah Palin says s...

Here's why Sarah Palin says she won't be running for president. She says she can be more effective at getting others elected by not running. And I thought, well, that's true, because in 2008 she got Obama elected.

David Letterman 644 quotes

Senate Minority Leader Harry ...

Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid says he will not seek re-election. Harry said he wants to spend more time with his family. As I always say, check with your family.

David Letterman 644 quotes

Two things you need to know a...

Two things you need to know about taxes. They've extended the deadline to April 18, and when you write your check, just make it out to China.

David Letterman 644 quotes

Everybody is wondering what P...

Everybody is wondering what Paris Hilton will be doing next, and hell, I'm wondering what she did before.

David Letterman 644 quotes

Unusual weather for New York ...

Unusual weather for New York City. Today it was 68 and foggy. No, wait a minute, that's me. I'm sorry, that's me.

David Letterman 644 quotes

They say there are about 12 m...

They say there are about 12 million illegal immigrants in this country. But if you ask a Native American, that number is more like 300 million.

David Letterman 644 quotes

Yesterday was Chinese New Yea...

Yesterday was Chinese New Year. It's the Year of the Rabbit. And here's how dumb I am. I'm still writing the Year of the Pig on my checks.

David Letterman 644 quotes

George Clooney is on the prog...

George Clooney is on the program tonight. Next week at this time I will be in a hardware store watching them mix paint.

David Letterman 644 quotes

Valentine's Day money-saving ...

Valentine's Day money-saving tip: Break up on February 13th, get back together on the 15th.

David Letterman 644 quotes

I hate decaffeinated coffee. ...

I hate decaffeinated coffee. It's useless brown water.

David Letterman 644 quotes

You'll never catch a nudist w...

You'll never catch a nudist with his pants down.

David Letterman 644 quotes

I think I might have a bad ps...

I think I might have a bad psychic advisor. When I asked her to contact the dead, she gave me Keith Richards' phone number.

David Letterman 644 quotes

Добрые, щедрые, великодушные: 6 советских актеров, которые были всеобщими любимчиками

23

Советских актёров часто ставят в пример как образец духовной силы, национальной гордости и внутренней красоты. Они стали символами эпохи, носителями культуры и нравственности. Но, как известно, за кул...

Десять кинозвезд, которые отлично поют

83

Актеры — люди творческие, но кто бы мог подумать, что некоторые из них скрывают прекрасный голос. В эпоху раннего Голливуда актеров с музыкальными способностями было немало — это считалось скорее норм...

Мэрилин Монро, Ким Кардашьян и другие

115

Неузнаваемая Ким Кардашьян в объективе фотографа Маркуса Клинко, 2009 год. Памела Андерсон в самой первой съёмке для журнала «Playboy», 1990. На фото голливудская актриса Dorothy Lamour и шимпанзе Джи...

Что стало с детьми-звездами: Рэдклифф и компания спустя годы

219

Расскажем, как сложилась судьба актеров, которые начинали сниматься еще в детстве.
Остаться на вершине в Голливуде удаётся не каждому, особенно если путь начался в детстве. Одни актёры теряются из-за...

Жизнь за границей: как изменились судьбы 7 уехавших телеведущих

541

Два года назад отечественное телевидение столкнулось с беспрецедентной кадровой тектоникой — целая группа ярких и узнаваемых ведущих стремительно исчезла с экранов федеральных каналов. Эти лица долгие...

Кира Найтли, Деми Мур и другие

165

Кира Найтли на страницах журнала к выходу фильма «Пиджак», 2005. Следы динозавра, раскопанные в русле реки Палакси. Техас. США. 1952г. Самая большая женщина рядом с самым маленьким мужчиной, 1922 год....