Americans whisper the word Al...
Americans whisper the word Alzheimer's because their government whispers the word Alzheimer's. And although a whisper is better than the silence that the Alzheimer's community has been facing for decades, it's still not enough. It needs to be yelled and screamed to the point that it finally gets the attention and the funding that it deserves and needs.
I remember thinking as I was ...
I remember thinking as I was doing the jokes for the first time, "If I can hear that very clearly, I'm not hearing laughter." It just became deafening, this buzzing noise. I mean, it was brutal. It was really terrible. Then I remember thinking, "At least nobody important, or anyone who I really respect, saw that." And then literally right when I went off the stage, Jerry Seinfeld got up and went on. So I was like, "Oh great. Seinfeld saw me bomb." On the other hand, I thought, "At least no one will be thinking of me anymore. They'll just be focusing on him."
I've never really had a real ...
I've never really had a real job. When I was young doing stand-up, I'd get 50 bucks a week here or 100 bucks a week there. You know, sometimes for headlining one of the rooms, or MC-ing, or something like that. So yeah, I've never had like a normal job.
Some of my friends would lie ...
Some of my friends would lie to girls to get them, or do things that - you know, they would cheat on girls. I was just never in the realm of what, you know, what's instilled to me, you know? Yeah, I mean, my mom's a social worker, for God's sakes.
I'd moved to L.A., and everyo...
I'd moved to L.A., and everyone's actors here and writers, they were like super emotional and super in touch with their feelings, and it seemed like every two weeks one of my friend just coming to me and, like, you hurt my feelings the other day, dude.
I've never had something - li...
I've never had something - like, you know, drunk people have tried to do that to me, and I instantly shut it off. I say, don't to this, dude; you'll feel terrible about this later. It'll be - I'll bring it up all the time; I'll make fun of you. Just save yourself the embarrassment and don't do it.
For me and my wife...the easi...
For me and my wife...the easiest part of my life is my marriage. Like if everything was as smooth and easy and fun as my relationship with my wife then I would have a much easier time getting through the day. We really get along and we like the same stuff.
I'm not entirely comfortable ...
I'm not entirely comfortable saying I'm an actor, because it seems like a very weird, almost dorky thing to say you are. I laugh after every take just out of the discomfort I feel that I'm even on film. It's an awkward thing for me to be doing. Once we get going, it's always fine, and as we're shooting, I'm never thinking about it. I'd say that all my time in front of the camera is equally uncomfortable for me.
It's definitely not true what...
It's definitely not true what they say about women wanting a guy with a sense of humour. What women mean is that they want a guy with a sense of humour who is really handsome. If a girl had a choice between Brad Pitt or me, she'd pick Brad Pitt. And I'm a lot funnier than he is.
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