Aziz Ansari ,quotes

Do It Under the Influence Your...

Do It Under the Influence Yourself! That's what we're shooting for! Get drunk and make your dreams come true.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

Once you become a comedian, yo...

Once you become a comedian, you accept that people are just going to yell stuff at you.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

I know my fan base is a smart ...

I know my fan base is a smart group of people.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

Most single people I know, mys...

Most single people I know, myself included, have a difficult time even meeting up with the people they like, be it busy schedules, texting games, or whatever.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

So many gay jokes tonight abou...

So many gay jokes tonight about (James) Franco. Apparently if you're clean, well dressed and mildly cultured, you're super gay now. Is that why the rest of you guys are so aggressively fat and dirty? You think if you read one book and take a shower, dicks are going to just fly into your face.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

If you look up feminist in the...

If you look up feminist in the dictionary, it just means someone who believes men and women have equal rights...

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

I was surprised to learn that ...

I was surprised to learn that research showed arranged couples tended to be happier in the long run.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

In this era, we have more choi...

In this era, we have more choice than any group of people ever. When you are out at night, anyone in the universe can contact you instantly. Think about how crazy that is compared to even a few decades ago.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

I just think it's sad that the...

I just think it's sad that the main places in our culture that we designate to meet new people are bars and nightclubs..

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

I'm so jealous of people who h...

I'm so jealous of people who have crushes on people they go to school with, or work with. That's such a blessing. You actually get to see them all the time and spend time with them.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

When you meet someone you real...

When you meet someone you really like and connect with, I think that's very special, and not to be taken for granted.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

You want what you can't have. ...

You want what you can't have. And if someone's being shitty to you, just move on. If someone's being shitty to you, no matter how great they are, that's shitty, and you don't want be with someone who treats you shitty.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

It's much more fun to share an...

It's much more fun to share and laugh at the bad times and the frustrations. I find you get a much deeper connection with the audience that way.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

I'm an optimist - I feel like ...

I'm an optimist - I feel like an amazing part of life is that at any moment.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

I like going out and I like be...

I like going out and I like being single, but a growing part of me would rather just stay home, cook food with someone I really like, and do nothing.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

I've never done online dating....

I've never done online dating.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

I've always tried to maintain ...

I've always tried to maintain that I don't have any advice to give. I'm a curious observer.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

Everyone's first thought is '...

Everyone's first thought is 'These women are going to take advantage of you' or 'Someone's only going to date you because you're famous.' That stuff's not really an issue because that's super-easy to see through.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

I live in L.A., I go on tour a...

I live in L.A., I go on tour all the time, I'm in New York half the year - it's very hard to be in a relationship.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

Comedians don't have hits. You...

Comedians don't have hits. You have to have a whole brand-new hour. You have no hits to rely on.

Aziz Ansari 03.03.2018 03:03:03 111 quotes

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